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In: Anthology

Hiding Place – Busisiwe Mahlangu


How many mouths can you trust with your name?
How many hands can you trust with your body?


I remember you shrunk
Crumbling when words became stones
They hit your knock-knees and stopped the kissing
You learnt to walk like you’re falling apart


You make a wish on your face
You pop a zit
You scar yourself to measure the time healing takes
After years of scratching pimples, you know
Calling your skin ugly
will not make it go away


The advert on the television
said, “give us your scars, we will drown them”
You tucked your cellulite in a jean
wrapped a scarf around your chest
You went to the shop
and bought Bio-Oil under disguise


There is always someone suggesting a way to fix yourself
There is a way to make tummy-rolls roll off you
There is a way to burn the bulge under your arm
There is a way to cut your hips
There is a bra that can hold your breasts to your chin
All these people think you want to exit your body


You can start running
from all the mouths that want to swallow your body like a fault
You can start running
from yourself when you are holding a spade to collapse the fault
Remember that you own one body
This is not a suggestion


How many parts of you do you let your mouth speak?
How many parts of you do you let your hands hold?


Once, you could fit your whole body in a hand
Where do you go to carry yourself now?


Busisiwe Mahlangu born in 1996, is a writer, performer and TEDx Speaker from Pretoria, South. Her debut collection Surviving Loss has been adapted and produced for theatre at the South African State Theatre as part of the Incubator programme 2018/2019. Busisiwe is currently studying for a BA in Creative Writing at the University of South Africa.