After Sonia Sanchez’s “Poem At Thirty”
perhaps I should begin by telling you about the night
but I’m six long, long miles away
bewildered, travelling in a boulevard of dead bodies
and merrying vultures—
a quadrant, where lies the rest of me.
But I can tell you of the dreams
the real ones that found sloughs to dwell in
away from the cold of their own terrain
watching indifferently, the shivering bodies of their own occupants
I’m climbing out the splintered piece of a shipwreck
my eyes finding its tears, how did I survive?
how did I survive the deluge
I thought I too fell with the resigned bodies
Fell. Who picked me up from this dream
who ruined me so
who dragged me away from the confines of my own blue miracle
my father is dead, long, long time ago
my mother enthralled in trauma
my shadow, my closest ally, forsakes me in the dark
I reach for my father’s hand in the curtains
I think of love as a straw guiding me down a steep hill
I think of joy and happiness
as twined helixes too crooked for my mind
I think of this fire as magical claws
leaving incurable bruises in their wake
I think of many things that stink like blood clots unmopped
I reach for his hand in the curtains
guide me, guide me through the lengthy hunger, fire and desolation
through the tongue’s pestilence, anger and betrayal
guide me, I’m six long, long miles away
from encountering the girl on that couch
who holds the manual for overcoming fear and resentment
from being afraid no more of the night
from having no use for a shadow that abandons me in the dark
from falling in love with dust clinging to my feet
from finally letting the sun find space in my eyes
even though I don’t know where I go from there
Abdulrahim Hussani is a 25-year-old Nigerian writer. He is a graduate of Pure Chemistry from Usmanu DanFodio University, Sokoto, Nigeria. He has received several recognitions for his writings, including 2019 Poetically Written Prose Contest (winner), WRR Green Author Prize 2016 (winner), Boston Review’s Aura Estrada 2019 Short Story Contest (finalist), 2019 ACT Award (shortlisted), Nigerian Students Poetry Prize 2019 (shortlisted), Eriata Oribhabor Poetry Prize 2019 (shortlisted), 2018 ANA Kano/Peace Panel Poetry Prize (winner). His works appear or are forthcoming in Boston Review, Praxis Magazine, KSR, and Memento: An Anthology of Contemporary Nigerian Poetry. He is presently working on a poetry chapbook.